Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Frustrated!

Have you ever been so frustrated you can't even put it into words? That is me right now. My husband is sick and the insurance companies only care that it is going to cost to much money right now to replace his pacemaker. He went to the doctor yesterday for pneumonia - which by the way he hasn't had since he got the pacemaker back in the 1990's -and his heart rate is only 72 beats per minute. His pacer is set for 72 beats which means his actual heart is doing NO work at this point so if the pacer quits guess what? So does his heart! Not Cool Insurance People! Not Cool. So here I sit completely helpless but to sit by and wait, and wait and wait.....and pray. Pray that God works it perfectly in his timing that before his pacemaker gives out that we can get this one fixed. That is the only comfort that I have right now - God is in control of this and he has a plan. I just can't see the outcome- yet. I will someday. I will look back on this and take from it the fact that I am having to lean completely on him for my strength and he is holding me tight.

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